
Low Libido: How It Affects Relationships and the Importance of Self-Care
18 March 2025Let’s be honest—cancer changes everything.
It changes your body, your energy, your emotions… and it can absolutely change your relationship with touch, sex, and intimacy. For many survivors, there’s a quiet grief that comes with the loss of sensuality or confidence. And for their partners, there’s often confusion and fear around how to be close again.
But here’s the truth: you are still worthy of pleasure, connection, and joy. And while the path may look different now, there is a path. I know, because I’ve walked it with many beautiful survivors—each one courageous enough to say: I want more than just survival—I want to feel whole again.
Here are 5 gentle ways to begin that journey:
1. Relearn Your Body—On Your Own Terms
Your body might not move, feel, or look the same as it once did—and that’s okay. Start by simply getting curious. Lightly touch your skin with a feather, a brush, or your fingertips. Notice what feels good. Explore where you carry tension or numbness. This is not about performance—it’s about presence.
> Tip: Try mirror work, gentle stretching, or a guided self-touch meditation to reconnect with your physical self.
2. Talk About It—Even When It’s Awkward
It’s okay to feel nervous, frustrated, or unsure. Whether you’re solo or in a relationship, open, honest communication is essential. Share what feels safe, what feels triggering, and what you’re curious about. If you’re with a partner, invite them into this new phase with patience and compassion.
> Tip: Use tools like “yes/no/maybe” lists or write a letter if speaking feels too hard.
3. Embrace Comfort-First Intimacy
Intimacy after cancer isn’t just about sex. It’s about connection. Shared laughter, cuddling, massage, and even hand-holding are powerful ways to rebuild safety and affection. Sometimes the most healing moments happen outside the bedroom.
> Tip: Explore sensual massage oils, warm baths together, or just lying close and breathing in sync.
4. Use Products That Support You—Not Shame You
There is no shame in using lubricants, toys, or positioning aids. In fact, they can make all the difference. As an Ignite Intimacy Consultant, I help clients choose body-safe, cancer-friendly products that support pleasure, not pressure.
> Tip: Look for pH-balanced, unscented lubricants, and start with soft, non-penetrative toys to explore sensation
5. Move Your Body with Kindness
Gentle exercise, like Pilates or Aquafit, isn’t just great for your muscles—it helps release endorphins, restore confidence, and improve circulation. Every time you move, you’re saying: I deserve to feel good in this body.
> Tip: Focus on core strength, pelvic floor work, and mindful movement to awaken sensual energy from within.
You Are Not Alone.
Whether you’re just beginning treatment or years into recovery, it’s never too late to reconnect with your body—and with joy. Intimacy after cancer looks different for everyone, but it is always possible.
If you’d like a safe, supportive space to explore this further, I’m here for you.
With care,
Charmain Hind
Cancer Exercise Specialist | Ignite Intimacy Consultant